If you ask anyone who has ever lived with me, they will tell you I am not a morning person. In part, that is true, but I’ve learned that that narrative is not as much true as the one that says I don’t like to communicate in the morning. That is true. I just don’t. Talking is work for me, and when I wake up, I don’t have the physical or emotional energy enough to regulate the effort necessary to have a pleasant conversation, even if it’s just “What’s for breakfast?”
What I have learned over the last few years is that I really do enjoy mornings, and I’ve even learned how to accommodate my desire not to talk right away. I’ve established a morning routine that helps me start the day well, and for me, that’s paid all sorts of dividends in getting my day started in the right mindset, keeping my relationships with those I love healthy, and helping me establish what I hope to gain from the day.
How do I do that? I’ll tell you, but let me preface by saying what works for me may not work for you. My routine has been a process over time of learning what helps and doesn’t. What works at this season of life may not for the next one, but what I have learned is that I enjoy days when I have my routine much more than those I don’t.
First, what are the benefits of a morning routine? Humans are creatures of habit, and habits come from rhythm and routine. When we have a rhythm that we follow, we feel more confident and ready to face that which is before us. Routines help us gather ourselves in a way that helps us meet expectations and provides an inner calm necessary to meet the potential outer chaos of life.
By establishing routine, we also can take time to notice and learn about ourselves – who we are, what our likes/dislikes are, what gives us energy or what depletes it. This knowledge helps us deal with stress in a healthier way.
In general, we have enough hurry in our days. By taking some time (and it doesn’t need to be much) first thing in the morning, we get the day started by not spiking our stress and need to do.
What should a morning routine include? Consider what’s valuable to you. For me, it’s quiet, space, slowness, physical exercise, food, and energy.
When I think of a morning routine, I think of packing the essentials of what I need for my energy in various forms for the day. I’m an introvert and gain energy by being alone so, for those first few minutes of the day, being alone allows me to gain energy for the day. As a result, I get up a few minutes before anyone else in my house. The exception is my dog (key: she doesn’t talk). I free her from her crate and send her outside.
I drink a full glass of water first thing in the morning. After we’ve slept for so long, our bodies need the fluid.
I get the coffee going. Yes, I drink coffee. It’s part of my morning routine which you’ll see in a minute.
I don’t like clutter; it drains me, so while the coffee is brewing, I put away the clean dishes from the night before.
After the coffee is ready and if the weather is conducive, I take a cup, which is chipped but remains my favorite, and sit on our front porch and enjoy the sun on me for a few minutes. I’ve found the sunlight helps with my circadian rhythm, telling my body that it’s morning and time to be awake. I also do some inspiration reading, pray, and meditate (I’m working myself up beyond a minute of deep breathing. It’s a process.). I’ve learned that these things create space in my mind that otherwise wouldn’t be there and allows me to be creative for the day ahead.
I mentally run through the to-dos of the day ahead – the whats, whos, and hows – as much as I can anticipate. I plan dinner and decide if I need to take something from the freezer to thaw and about when I need to plan to start preparing it later in the afternoon/evening.
What I have failed to mention is that, with rare exception, I intentionally do not touch my phone or any device until at least this point. I find that if I do, I feel like multiple voices are talking to me before I am ready to face the day, and I get overwhelmed.
By this time, someone in my house is usually stirring. We make breakfast and feed our physical bodies. In all my years growing up, I had perfected the quick bowl of cereal, bagel, or toast, snarfing it down and running to get to school or work. Over the past few years, I’ve come to understand that breakfast really is the most important meal of the day and helps our bodies for long beyond the morning hours. I am mindful of incorporating multiple food groups and slower burning nutrients, like protein and fat, to keep my body going. I also make it a point to eating at least one vegetable or fruit.
After breakfast, for me, this is the time to work out. This varies on what it looks like, but I adapt to what works for my body and the time available.
All these things help me prepare for my day. Sometimes, it’s a pretty short time, like 10 minutes, and sometimes, I can afford for it to be longer. But, what I have learned from putting this practice into place is that I am more prepared for the day ahead when it happens than when it doesn’t.
My morning routine certainly won’t look like your morning routine, but taking some time for at least a deep breath before running long and hard into a full day gives us presence of mind and a bit of peace. What would your ideal morning look like, and what is one way you can change your morning to incorporate a piece of it?